Books have a unique selling point that a movie can't - internal monologue; however, many aspiring authors never take advantage of this hidden gem. Indeed, many popular writing podcasts and books colloquially call this "navel gazing" and caution against its overuse, and while that's true, too much internal monologue is not a good thing - providing your characters with thoughts and desires takes them from a cardboard cutout to a fleshed-out human in your readers' minds.
What is internal monologue?
In a sentence, internal monologue is the practice of narrating your characters' thoughts onto the page as though the audience is literally inside your character's head. It is most commonly used in novels; however, this can sometimes be seen in plays and even on TV.
From the perspective of a novel, an internal monologue is often a break in the current scene's action to address something your character is thinking or feeling. This can provide critical context to a situation that would otherwise be unavailable to your reader.
When should you use it?
The internal monologue gets a lot of criticism in writing education and for good reason - any time you are in your character's head, you are not in the action where real, interesting things are happening. An internal monologue also flies in the face of one of the most famous pieces of writing advice given to most authors: show, don't tell.
By expressing your characters' discontentment with something through internal monologue, such as:
John handed Sally the bouquet of roses.
I really hate roses, and I've told him this a hundred times.
She looked up at John, "Thank you."
You're spoon-feeding the reader the scene; now imagine the same scene, but showing
John handed Sally the bouquet of roses.
Sally looked down at the flowers and let out a soft sigh before placing them on a nearby table.
John swallowed. "You like them?"
"They're fine, John," Sally replied.
This scene has so much more energy; you can feel how nervous John is when he asks how she feels, and her dismissive tone says way more than any internal monologue could.
That said, using internal monologue here can also be a way to hide a key detail:
John handed Sally the bouquet of roses.
I really hate roses, and I've told him this a hundred times.
She smiled up at him warmly, "Thank you, John! They're my favourite!"
In this version, we've built tension in the scene; her thoughts are in direct opposition to her actions. This gives the reader questions - why is she lying to John to protect him? Herself?
The takeaway is that when it comes to internal monologue, it should be interwoven into a scene carefully to raise the stakes, provide insights, or provide context of why your character made a terrible decision in a high-stakes situation (said a boy's name wrong cause he liked him, for example).
What you should not be doing with internal monologue is using it as a crutch to explain plot holes, provide emotions to characters, or as filler to pad your page count. These are all great examples of misusing internal monologue.
What is Misusing Internal Monologue?
If your character is spending more time thinking and less time doing... you might be overusing internal monologue.
If your character spends 3 pages recalling his training on stop, drop, and roll while his shirt is actively burning ... you might be overusing internal monologue.
If your characters have a 3-sentence conversation over 20 pages of overthinking ... you might be overusing internal monologue.
All jokes aside, if your characters' thoughts are overtaking the action - you're likely overusing internal monologue. Your characters' thoughts should almost always be quick and between beats to amplify a scene.
When you halt a scene to include internal monologue, you are removing the reader completely from the current action and removing the stakes. Remember, there are no real consequences in a character's mind; a perceived slight is not the same as a real conflict, and if you go on for long enough, your reader may forget entirely what the scene was about.
How do I notate internal monologue?
When it comes to internal monologue and how to format it, there are a few best practices to consider.
First, keep your internal monologue in the first person present, even if you're telling your story in the third person. This may seem counterintuitive at first, but from the perspective of your character, who is thinking they are in the current moment right now, thinking to themselves. Consider your own thoughts: when you think in words, you likely use "I" and "me" and are reflecting in the present.
Keep your internal monologue in its own paragraph; this quickly allows readers to understand the separation between action or dialogue and the monologue.
Finally, many authors use italics to indicate internal monologue; while this practice has fallen out of favour, it can still be seen in many popular works of fiction and can provide a clean delineation between interior and exterior dialogue when writing larger blocks of monologue.
The key to effectively notating internal monologue is to be consistent. If you generally use italics when you start a monologue, do so every time; this lets your reader get used to your book's particular formatting and lets it fade into the background while they engage with your story.
What perspectives can use it?
Internal monologue can be used in most perspectives; the key, however, is that you stick to one character's perspective in any given scene. If you are telling the scene from the perspective of Sally, you can't suddenly switch to Tom's head - even if your story is told by an omniscient narrator. Jumping between character viewpoints can be jarring to the reader and make your novel harder to follow.
In the case of a first-person novel, you must stick to the POV character at all times - this can be both a great benefit by hiding third-party intentions but can be difficult for that exact same reason - your reader can only ever know what your character knows.
Internal monologue, when used correctly, adds dimension and richness to your characters and your world. Don't be afraid to add it in. Just remember not to overuse it in place of action or showing instead of telling.
The difference between an author and a dreamer is the tap of the keys, or the stroke of a pen.
